>4 am, sitting alone and throwing scratched saint graphs in the fireplace

>the phone interrupts my deep meditation

>it's Kirsch, sounding like he found the cure for cancer

>"DAYBIT"

>"DAYBIT"

>he's out of breath

>"DAYBIT WAT IF WE SUMMON HITLER AND HE HUNTS GUDA THROUHG AN ORDER

>my pupils widen

>Kirsch can barely articulate the pure raw emotion coming over him

>"DDD...D...DAYBIT WHAT IF H...HITLER TAKES HIS SHIRT OF AND STARTS HUNTING GUDA WITH A LONGINUS"

>with those words all reality breaks

>i can only see a shirtless hitler fucking up guda

>it's so fucking rad

>i start demolishing everything in my office in a frenzy

>Kirsch is on the other line through the entire ordeal, screaming his lungs out

>then a realization hits

>hitler breaks the 1900s rule

>i cry

>all i wanted was a good order

>a fun order

>i pick up the phone and scream inarticulately at Kirsch

>no words are needed - he understands me immediately, he starts weeping

>this goes on for 10 minutes

>"d...daybit"

>"daybit what if mashu get"

>"what if mashu gets raped by beryl"

>not sure if i heard him correctly

>"what if beryl burns chaldeas food and gordes has to burn lolivinci because they have no food"

>irony taste in my mouth, realize it's blood

>"y.you mean to eat her?"

>"NO, to save humanity DAYBIT!!!"

>grab my dick with my left hand and my idea crayons with the right

>beryl could probably do it with about 20 good servants, i realize, he knows the singularity

>"DAYBIT BAD SERVANT BAD SERVANT DAYBIT"

>don't know what that's about but it sounds rad as fuck

>write it down also